New Year, New Trimester

We made it to 2013!  I know it sounds silly, but I learned about the Mayan apocalypse in Spanish class every year in high school, so even though I didn't really believe in it, I always kind of worried that maybe the world wouldn't make it to 2013.  But here we are!

In 2012, we worked through a lot of hard times and uncertainty.  I tried to keep my eye on the good, though, because we had a lot of joy too.  Every day with Eliot keeps getting better and better.  Our little family has a lot to be thankful for, and most of the difficult things we faced in 2012 have come to a resolution as much as they can.

As I look forward to 2013, I am not putting too much pressure on myself.  This is always my approach to the new year.  I want to finish my dissertation.  I want to grow this baby and also provide Eliot with all of the love he needs.  I want to pay off more student loans (and we have a three-year plan to tackle them).  I want to give more.  And I want to read and write more....

And since I'm at a milestone in my pregnancy, I figured it was about time for my first lengthy baby update.

Yesterday marked 14 weeks for the baby and me.  We are now into the second trimester!  This pregnancy has been a lot different than my first.  Maybe I did have a stomach virus earlier in the week because I haven't gotten sick in a few days.  My morning sickness did last a bit longer this time (and I'm hesitant to say it is over).  I get bouts of headaches that last about three days about once a week, which I also had with Eliot.

As for cravings, it is never a matter of what I want, but what I think I can manage to get down.  Nothing sounds good.  I can't even look at fast food commercials.  At first, I wanted red meat all the time (ribs and steaks!), which is kinda weird since we generally limit eating meat to once a week and not in our home.  For a little while, I just wanted sour things, like lemonade and sour candy, but I am now wanting sweet desserts these days.  I fully anticipated wanting nothing but milkshakes and salads like I did with Eliot, yet that hasn't been the case.  I even bought milkshake supplies in preparation once we got our positive test.  Who knows what that means.

So far, I have gained three or four pounds.  I am showing a little, but it looks more like a food baby.  I wear a bellaband because it is hard to button the top button on my jeans.  Most of my shirts are kind of stretchy anyway, but I ordered a couple of maternity tee-shirts so I don't destroy all of my clothes.  Last time, I just had four maternity tank tops and one pair of jeans.  While this will probably be my last pregnancy, I'm trying to give myself a few more options while keeping in mind that accessories make all the difference.

At this point, I am most looking forward to finding out the gender.  I could technically find out in two weeks, but I'm planning to wait until I am 18 weeks just to be a little more sure.  We waited until 22 weeks with Eliot (it'd be $200 to find out at 18 weeks in Lynchburg, but there is a cheaper place here in Chesapeake), so this actually feels super early.  Maybe I'll write more on my suspicions and what I'm hoping for at another time.  We have a few names picked out too, but we will probably just wait until we have an official name before I announce it.

Honestly, sometimes I completely forget that I'm even pregnant when I'm feeling OK.  A human growing inside of you is always a bit incomprehensible, so I try not to feel guilty about it.  I mean, with Eliot, I was always wondering what it was going to be like.  I had more time to think back then.  Now life is busy in general and I'm trying to chase Eliot around as well.  And I know what it will be like to have a newborn.  And I'm not that nervous, really, just maybe nervous about balancing two, but not that worried.  For now, I stare at the ultrasound picture and try to replay it in my head.  I write letters.  I dream of holding our baby in July.  It's going by so very fast and I'm relieved to no longer be worrying all the time.