Did I mention that we've been transitioning Eliot to his "big boy" bed again?
After a year and nine months of co-sleeping, we transitioned him to his toddler mattress on our floor, which went OK. At the end of a week and a half, he would fall asleep in our bed, be moved over to his bed, and then we'd allow him back in our bed the second time he got up (the first time, I'd lay him back down).
After a little while, though, he got a terrible virus. He had to sleep elevated, which meant I had to hold him all night.
And then we were getting closer to selling our home. We were having at least a showing every other day (usually every day). Do you know how hard it is to get a mattress BACK ON a toddler bed without messing up the bed skirt? It's frustrating, especially when you're trying to keep the whole house clean for showings all the time. Arranging his floor bed set-up was kind of complicated with floor mats, lots of pillows, blankets, and so on. I knew when we moved, I'd have to do it all over again since we'd be in a new place, so we let him back in bed with us for a few months.
So, after we got settled into our new house, we bought Eliot a twin-sized mattress. That thing is comfyyy! I want to sleep on it all the time by myself! We've been working on the transition for about two weeks (or three? I can't remember!), and it honestly is going a TON smoother than last time.
Before, there were tears. A lot of tears. And he would NOT go to sleep in his own mattress even if I lay with him. He had to be in our bed to get to sleep at first, and he is a light sleeper, so moving him didn't always work.
Maybe last time he just wasn't quite ready. Maybe he understand more now. Maybe he likes his larger bed. I don't know, but this is how we have been doing it.
We made a big deal about picking out the mattress and getting sheets. Eliot doesn't have a favorite blanket or stuffed animal because I am his stuffed animal. Seriously. He cuddles my arm all night. So, I tried to find something similar to stand in for me. He has a crocodile from the aquarium.... That is kind of long like an arm. Also, he loves cars, so he has a Lightening McQueen pillow.
When it is bedtime, I tell him to go night-night. Sometimes he goes for the big boy bed; other times he tries to get in our bed, but I correct him and he lays down. We cuddle like usual until he falls asleep. He is a horrible sleeper and it takes forever for him to get in a deep sleep, so sometimes this takes 20 minutes and others more like an hour (or a dreaded two hours). When he is asleep, I replace my arm with the crocodile.
If he stirs and starts calling for me, I ignore him until he gets up. I used to lay with him, but I gradually distanced myself to the point where I just sit next to him to calm him down (and he nestles right back to sleep) or tell him from my bed that it is OK and to go back to sleep. If he does this twice and actually gets up, I let him in our bed. It is usually 3:00 am or later by then anyway, and I just can't keep getting up all night.
My hope is that through consistency, we can slowly move him into his own room. I'm not stressing about kicking him out of our bedroom all the way before the baby comes. I think he might be able to sleep through the newborn cries, and we'll figure it out when we get there. I have found that when I am calm about a transition with Eliot, it goes a lot more smoothly than when I am putting pressure on the two of us and trying to meet a deadline. I learned that one while trying to figure out breastfeeding in the hospital, and I have tried not to forget it.
To be honest, I really loved having Eliot in bed with us--and still do--so if I can just get him to come snuggle in the morning, I'm counting that as a big time win.
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