34 Weeks

Just a little over a month left!

I got so excited after my last doctor's appointment because I started breaking everything down by weeks.  Suddenly, Jack being here doesn't seem so far!
-At 35 weeks, I will have a doctor's appointment and the Group B Strep test.
-At 36 weeks, I will have just had Jack's pool party.  We've definitely been looking forward to that as a big event.  We keep saying, "Let's finish this project before Jack's party."  It's to the point that I don't know what we'll do after the party--but I probably won't want to do anything.  At my 36-week appointment, we'll have an ultrasound!  I had three ultrasounds with Eliot (and the last one was an emergency type situation the day I was induced), and now this will be FIVE with Jack.  I truly appreciate how the doctors here take more precautions.  They give everyone a 36-week ultrasound, and to me that seems like a good idea.
-At 37 weeks, I will have another appointment and can schedule my induction if I am going to be induced at 39 weeks.  I'll also learn if I am progressing any.
-At 38 weeks, it'll be another appointment, checking my progress, and scheduling my induction if I plan to wait until 40 weeks.  By this point, I'll be going crazy, but it will be pretty much over.

I have to be honest here and say that the looming July due date didn't always bring me peace.  It scared me because of my dissertation.  It has been hard to write with a toddler, and I know it will be more difficult with both a toddler and a newborn.  I know I can do it, but I also knew that I really needed to finish my proposal before the baby came or I'd keep putting it all off.  My proposal itself is 58 pages long, and without getting into too many details, the remaining work requires a lot of steps and, yes, work, but it is more "auto pilot" in a way than the proposal has been.  I finished my proposal one week ago.  My committee is offering some light feedback and then we're hoping I can defend it before Jack comes.  If not, it isn't too big of a deal.  I'm just glad the proposal itself is written with some minor revisions remaining that I will get to this week.  With that behind me, I am able to relax and focus on Jack coming.

With Eliot at this point, I didn't want to do much more than lay around.  This time, though, I am itching to remain active.  We work in the yard pretty much every day, which has been eventful enough to keep me from feeling like we never leave the house.  Sometimes I find myself regretting it, though, because I end up with pains.  I went to the beach last week and tried to drink water and snack constantly, but still got sick in the car (after only staying an hour).  I was getting a lot of contractions for a few days, and Chris kept saying he was taking me to the hospital.  I said I was doing too much; Chris said I wasn't drinking enough water; the doctor said both at my 33-week appointment.  So, I've been drinking exclusively water lately and one glass of lemonade with dinner.  The other morning, it rained so we couldn't do much yard work.  I had done my work for my job before Eliot woke up.  After the sun came out, I settled into the hammock and Eliot fell asleep cuddling my legs.  I lay in that hammock for about an hour doing nothing, just looking up at the leaves in the Japanese maples above me and the palms around the pool.  It was great to have one hour to myself to relax, feel my older son sleeping on me and my younger son squirming inside, and not worry about or do anything.

I think that my appetite is increasing some.  I am eating larger portions than before, which are still a little less than I'd eat non-pregnant.  If I splurge, I feel so blerg that I can't find the motivation to do anything at all, not even (or especially not) dishes.  Chris has taken over dish duty in the evenings because I'm just so done by then.  My weight is doing OK, though, I think.  Over a couple of months, I wasn't gaining much (a pound every two weeks?) despite eating frequent, small meals; however, I think I'm at about 20 pounds gained, maybe a little less, so I am on pace to be at a good place when Jack comes.  For a long while, I had been craving icy, sour things, but lately, I don't know, nothing sounds great.  We tried splitting a blue raspberry drink from Dunkin Donuts between the three of us the other night to celebrate finishing the spring semester, but, meh, I'm just not into it anymore.  That's actually probably a good thing.  I'll just try to focus on drinking more water in the meantime.

Summer is my favorite season.  The beach, the pool, the warmth, the fruit, eating outside...  I was kind of worried about Jack coming right in the middle of the summer because I thought I'd feel too horrible at the end of my pregnancy to enjoy any of the usual summer activities and that then I'd have my hands full adjusting to a newborn.  I worried the summer would breeze by and we'd be stuck in another long, cold, nasty winter.  However, we've been doing a LOT of work to make our backyard into a tropical oasis, so I honestly don't even miss the beach too much.  And, you know, we might figure something out beach-wise too.  Until then, just stepping into our backyard is enough to make it feel like I'm at a resort.

This pregnancy, I have lived in four tank tops, two shirts, a pair of leggings, and two pairs of jeggings.  I also have a pair of non-maternity shorts that fit OK.  Instead of buying maternity shorts, I cut off one of the pairs of jeggings.  At first, it felt short-sighted.  Then I remembered that I won't be pregnant come fall when the weather grows cooler.  Well, it didn't work out as awesome as I hoped (the shorts are kind of too tight around my legs since they were jeggings), but it's nice to have another option.

Jack is moving a lot, especially when I eat.  I say that every time, but he is.  I love feeling him punch and kick and shift around.  It really blows my mind that he is in there--I never fully comprehend pregnancy.

When I break down the weeks and all of the exciting things we have going on, it feels like Jack will be here in no time.  In fact, it seems like it is just days away.  I hope it keeps feeling that way so I don't go too nuts waiting.  I am feeling antsy in my own skin.  It's not that I dislike being pregnant or that I even want it to end immediately necessarily, but I'm just ready to meet our boy.  I worried so much about missing feeling Eliot move at the end of my pregnancy--I thought I'd wake up the next morning and feel sad.  I was wrong.  Not only did I not wake up (because I never fell asleep), but I didn't miss being pregnant at all.  I was too captivated by our new baby boy.  I know it will be the same again, but that doesn't mean I'm not trying to hang on to each moment of this pregnancy and feeling for each kick.  That antsy feeling, though, it lingers still.  Just five or six more weeks.  Getting there.