Work, Play, and Writing a Dissertation

I sure was wrong about the weather (thankfully!).  It hasn't been all rain and gloom like I thought.  Instead, we've had nice, warm days with a little bit of rain here and there.  We've had picnics at the park, played in the backyard, and watched Chris get carried away with yard work in the name of palm trees (more on that later...).

I've gotten a lot of work done in the process too.  I'm at a good place with balancing family time with a toddler and grading.  Also, I hit a new level of progress with my dissertation.  I try not to write about school much on here, but I'll just say that I've never felt so close to this next step.  There are still many, many steps to follow, but I have struggled over the past year to write.  I have had to re-write my proposal about three times due to circumstances I can't control.  Throughout the process, my committee has been understanding and supportive.  It is still frustrating and hard to get going.  Sometimes it takes me an hour to get in a zone and figure out where I even left off with all of my research.  If I work while Eliot is napping, well, he is about to wake up after that hour (and I realistically need that nap time to grade).  And I cannot do that kind of writing while watching him.  Fortunately, my mom watches Eliot once a week for a few hours, but I often need that time to grade instead of writing.  Sometimes I lay awake at night just thinking of that dissertation and worrying about it and beating myself up about how I should be done by now.  However, I try to keep in mind that it is a big project, I can't control everything with it, I have a toddler and another baby on the way, and work full-time from home.  That's a lot to keep up with.  So, I'm hoping to finish up the proposal (!!) this weekend and then move on to the proposal defense (to then be followed by getting Institutional Review Board approval, conducting the research, analyzing the data, writing my conclusion, and defending the dissertation itself).

It is easy to get discouraged when I think of all the things I need to do and all of the commitments that I need to balance.  I worry about the stupidest things, like what the neighbors think of our front yard since we haven't mulched (if only they knew what we were doing out back...), and spread myself too thin over details that don't matter, like trying to keep the floors spotless--when you have a really dirty toddler getting multiple baths a day, the floor is going to have dirt on it.  However, this week, I am choosing to feel good about what I have accomplished and hoping for another productive week.

We'll Get There

Eliot has been a happier boy today.  Looking back, Chris and I have both been very busy over the past couple of weeks with work.  B term courses had final grades due, C term was just at mid-term, and D term courses were starting, so we have been pulled in a lot of different directions with a lot of grading and work to do.  This weird collision of sub-terms happens twice a year.  Not only am I responsible for my grades, but also keeping up with my team of 25 professors as well.  I absolutely love my job; it is so rewarding in so many ways.  It's a dream job.  The reality is that working from home and raising a toddler takes balance.  I try to work when he is asleep, eating, or distracted, but sometimes we watch more tv than I'd like or he has to play by himself when he doesn't want to since I have deadlines.  And that is just life--he can't always get what he wants.  So, maybe he has been acting up a little more out of boredom too.

Eliot's sleep has been off even more than usual lately too.  We're having inconsistently late nights, waking up for an hour or more at a time in the middle of the night, and sometimes very early mornings.  It really wasn't his fault last night....  One of the dogs woke him up and he had a lot of trouble getting back to sleep.  And I didn't listen to his request for milk--surely, he would just go back to sleep, right?

He's a good boy with a sensitive heart.  He's been so "off" lately in so many different ways (sleeping, his eating habits even, and his little fits out of frustration), and I feel really bad that he is working through some toddler things, but I know he is learning and growing.  We'll get there, him and me (and Chris too).

Grading and House Drama

What a whirlwind of a week.  I know it is Tuesday, but it feels like it is finally the weekend to me!

Chris and I are so blessed in our jobs.  We work from home.  When I was in undergrad, I knew I wanted to do something with English and at a college for my career, but I didn't think I could be a professor because I didn't think the right doors would open, yet here we are both teaching English for LUO.

Sometimes I think some people are under the impression that "work-at-home mom" is the same as a "stay-at-home mom".  Believe me, I'm not knocking stay-at-home moms.  They give up a lot and make sacrifices to stay at home, and if I couldn't work at home, I only hope I'd be able to stay at home or work part-time somehow.  Anyway, this week, I graded roughly 80 essays and 20 paragraphs in addition to all of the communication and supervisory duties I have.

Chris watching Eliot play in the dirt while I grade

With a toddler running around, I have a few instances when I can grade:  1. in the morning before Eliot wakes up at 7:30 am; 2. when Eliot naps (about two hours a day); 3. when Eliot goes to bed at night at 9:00 pm; 4. when Eliot plays by himself (but I feel guilty the whole time and have to re-direct him getting into trouble); 5. when Chris takes Eliot.  Finding a balance has been a year in the making and we're never quite there.  I'm not complaining.  I love working with my students.  I'm just saying it is indeed a situation that requires balance.

Grading break because Eliot woke up from his nap.  We're watching Yo Gabba Gabba on my laptop.

And when I get an email like this at the end of a course, I know I've done my job right.  And it is all worth it.  "Thanks for everything you did for me during this course of English 102.  I just wanted to express my gratitude and appreciation for working with me through a course that was filled with obstacles and trials.  I just want you to know that your professionalism and patience with me was second to none.  You are a special professor.  Thanks again and God's richest blessings."

So, that has been my week.  In addition to that, we have been showing the house.  We had three showings this past week, and our realtor suggested that we reduce the price.  At first, I was taken back.  Three showings seemed like a good amount of traffic.  It has only been up for two weeks and we realized that the first week was during a holiday (Easter).  Then I realized that some more expensive houses in the area had reduced their prices, so it was indeed time.  We dropped it by $5,000, which was our "bottom line" before.

It hurt at first.  We have put $15,000 and three years of work into this house.  We took two bathrooms back to the studs, re-built them, updated plumbing and wiring, and put in tile.  It took three months to do each bathroom.  And we have re-done the rest of the houses in ways you wouldn't guess.  A buyer wouldn't know that the kitchen had five layers of wall paper that I burnt my fingers scraping off with a steamer.  Or that we replaced all of the outlets, light switches, and covers.  Or that Chris and I cut in the flowerbeds out back with a shovel and a rake in the heat of August.  To someone else, all of those improvements are taken for granted in a way.  So, it is understandable if they don't see as much monetary value in a house as we do.

Then I think I found the house that would be perfect for us in Chesapeake.  I just have to hope that it stays on the market because it is priced well.  It is a "Great Bridge special" that you so often find in Chesapeake, but the full attic is like a cape cod.  It has a great screened-in porch and a nice deck.  The inside needs some work, but mostly just paint and a kitchen update (new counter tops--they're pink right now--and new appliances).  And I don't know the stories behind all of the work that they put into the house, just like I worry that people won't appreciate all of the little, time-consuming details we've undertaken.

Hopes of buying that new house helps ease the sting of reducing the price on our home.  I just hope that house in Chesapeake doesn't fly off the market, but if it does, I know we'll find another one we love too.

Family on All Sides

Taking a quick grading break.

This weekend was quite busy!  Our days are filled with working and then getting ready for the next batch of visitors or packing our bags for our next trip.  No complaints here!  I'm so glad to see family whenever we can.  This weekend it was my parents.  They came in on Friday and we had fun going to get apples from Johnson's Farm.  Then we did "work" around the house the next day.  My dad installed the new battery in the Golf (yes!).  He and Chris sanded down the back of our front door and then I painted it while my mom played with Eliot in the swing.  The back of our front door has been scratched up and flaking paint since we moved in.  The previous owner had a dog with separation anxiety, so it was in bad shape.  It looks so much better now!  We did a few other things around the house and then had dinner at my aunt's.

Over the weekend, our boiler broke.  Over the weekend, our boiler was fixed.  Phew!  When we turned it on, it sounded like someone was slamming a hammer into the pipes and radiators.  I hate that sound.  It did the same thing last year when we started it at first, so we called to get it tuned up right away.  The service man said it was normal, just the pipes expanding.  I didn't believe it, but the sound did go away.  This year, there was that sound again.  Horrible slamming!  It just didn't seem right.  As it turns out, it wasn't right.  Our boiler shut itself off due to all of the excessive pressure.  Made sense to me that the pipes and radiators were making that sound due to too much pressure....  We called a different service company.  Apparently, a valve wasn't working quite right and there was too much water.  He tinkered with it and got it operational.  If it acts up again, we will replace the valve, but it seems to be doing fine.

My parents are back at home now with our dogs.  Life with dachshunds is loud, but you never realize just how loud until they're gone.  I miss the little guys!  My parents are "dog sitting" so Chris, Eliot, and I can go to Williamsburg for a few days.  Then we'll go to Chesapeake for a quick, overnight trip, grab the pups, and head back to Lynchburg just in time for Christopher's parents to come in town next weekend for parents' weekend at Elizabeth's college--which means they all get to hang out with us at our house instead.  See what I mean about staying on the road and welcoming family in all the time?

Little bits of me has felt melancholy, though.  I don't mean to complain or whine.  I feel conflicted, really.  I am happy with now.  I love time with our families, Eliot is at a fun age, and Lynchburg is beautiful in the fall.  I love our jobs.  At the same time, I look forward to things changing and life evolving.  Where will we be in a year?  I wonder if or where we will move.  I wonder what it will be like for Eliot to be older, bigger, and doing more things.  I wonder when we will have our second baby and if that baby will be a boy or a girl--and who the baby will look like.  As I am beginning my dissertation course tomorrow, I wonder what it will be like to be finished with the thing.  I think that is the source of my angst.  I'm anxious.  I want my dissertation to be done and over and done done done with school for a while, but I haven't even started yet.  Probably not the best approach.  Sometimes I'd like to fast forward through life to the next part, but then I look at photos like the one below and yearn to freeze life--to freeze that baby boy and his baby cheeks and stunning eye lashes.  Good thing I don't have a life remote because I'm sure I'd make all the wrong choices.  Instead I'll try to savor each moment, love on that baby, and accept all of the changes that will surely come.

Spoon Me in Boonsboro

I feel like Chris and I have been glued to our laptops over the past three days.  Between my comps, his schoolwork, and both of our grading, there hasn't been much time for anything aside from paper plates, quick meals at different times, and exclusively indoor play dates with Baby.

This evening, though, we decided to make time for something fun.  I noticed the other day that there is a new frozen yogurt place open in Boonsboro.  It's like Lynchburg woke up one day and figured out that frozen yogurt is just all right.  We went from none to three in about six months--or less?  Or maybe more.  But not long!  Anyway, we went to check it out.  Pretty good, but more than anything it was nice to get out of the house and sit outside in the fall nighttime weather.

Truly made that hat for Eliot!  She worried that it was too big, but now it fits just about perfect.

Eliot wants to eat everything we do these days.  I gave him a few bites of mine.

By the way, Monday night at Spoon Me is "Family Night"--after 3:00 pm, buy two and get one free.  Doesn't work so well for us yet, but it could with friends!

We came home; Chris made something to eat; Eliot pulled a kitchen chair on himself.  What's a Katie to do?  I can't put the chairs elsewhere.  And I don't want to kick Eliot out of the dining room.  He'd only have the den.  Maybe I should put heavy things on the chair.  Is that counter productive?