One Month In: Looking Back at Pre-school

Eliot has been attending pre-school for a little over a month now. When Chris and I held him as a newborn, Chris said that it would just break his heart when Eliot goes off to school. And I worried so much about how he would do--how I could protect him if I weren't always around. But then I just knew I had to let go and allow him to grow on his own.

Starting pre-school wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. He was excited, but nervous. I think I carried a lump in my throat more than he did. After a couple of weeks, though, he started saying that he didn't want to go. He would complain before going to bed and whine in the morning. And when I dropped him off, he cried. I can think of many excuses as to why. This was an abrupt change, and I wanted to know what caused it. At the time, he was a little sick with a cold, so extra clingy. Also, he claimed he didn't want to go to the Bible class. I spoke with the teacher and she explained that he had gotten in trouble at the Bible class for not raising his hand. That stinker... Sometimes he gets his feelings hurt and holds onto it. Since I let the teacher know that he was bringing that up (which was likely just an excuse, really), she took extra steps to make him more comfortable. She did things she didn't have to. And now he loves it.

Eliot still says he doesn't want to go to school most mornings, but by the time we are ready to head out the door, he is fine with it. And as soon as he washes his hands in the classroom, he is excited to explore and play. And when I pick him up, he tells me how he had so much fun and wants to go back.

I don't want him to feel bad ever, and I don't want him to think he can't tell me what he is feeling. I don't want him to think that I am dismissive of his feelings, but sometimes I can't just let him quit simply because it is hard.

The same thing went for soccer. He was excited to play and did great at practice. I blogged about it before, but his first game was a disaster. He was full of tears and felt intimidated since everyone else seemed like they knew what they were doing. I did get him on the field eventually by holding his hand and running with him at first. By the end of the game, he was playing on his own, but it took a lot to get there. The next practice did not go well either. Chris said if he didn't play the second game either, maybe we should think about quitting. He is only three--and that is kind of young for soccer.

However, at the second game, he completely changed. He ran along, scored a goal, and was so happy to play. Ever since, he has scored at least one goal per game. He never cries or complains. He falls down and gets back up. He even is demonstrating some competitiveness, but not too much physical aggressiveness. He loves running and roaring like a dinosaur throughout the game. It's awesome that he is scoring some goals, but becoming a three-year-old soccer prodigy isn't my main concern. I always said that I had two goals to reach by the end of season: don't just cry the whole time and don't tackle everyone. Fortunately, after the first game, he has done great.

As a new parent, I wanted Eliot to be "advanced" and reach those milestones early. However, developing true character isn't necessarily when everything comes easy to a child, but instead how that child rises above and grows when faced with challenges--going further than he thought he could.

I'm proud of how Eliot is growing up. He is such a sweet, kind, happy kid. I know we have many challenges ahead of us--ones I can't even imagine--but we'll get there all in due time. Right now, I'm taking this one as a win.