I still receive texts about soccer field closures due to wet conditions. A big part of me misses seeing them play on those fields. And I always worry that I let my kids down by not pushing them harder in youth sports.

The excessive demands of youth sports is difficult to navigate. Every sport pushes to be year-round and specialized and expensive or else you fall behind. I always sought to keep my boys active and in some sort of organized sports for a few goals: heart health, building social skills (friendships and coachability), developing their technical skills so they would be prepared for middle or high school teams, and give them opportunities to explore their interests. I never wanted my kids to say, "I really wanted to try [this], but I never got the chance."

Following their lead, Eliot and Jack participated in soccer, basketball, ran road races, swimming, wrestling, tae kwon do, and also rowing/crew for Eliot. The only thing they haven't really played is football (I make small people) and baseball (they weren't really interested and our area is extremely competitive for baseball). They certainly experienced a sampling of it all. However, other parents heavily invest their time and money into one specialized sport and it makes me feel like my kids are behind in a "special interest" sportwise. Did I push them enough?

Eliot played soccer from age three to eleven, but his interests and priorities shifted. He got very invested in Scouts and it was hard to juggle two to three practices a week along with games when he preferred to be on campouts or working on merit badges. He poured a lot of his time and heart into advancement requirements and is at Life rank after just two years. At school, he is passionate about playing tuba in band. He earned first chair, was invited to play in All-City (only one tuba selected), and plays in Jazz Band. Since he isn't playing soccer, we focus on being active with running and strength training at home. Once a week, he runs with a local club and also runs on his own. He tried wrestling with the middle school team this year, but just wasn't feeling it--he's more of a teamwork guy than a competitor. When I see other kids playing soccer, I can't help but worry that I should have kept him on teams so he'd have a chance at the middle school team, but he has found a place at school through band and Scouts outside of school.

Jack loved soccer too, but started getting migraines in second grade. Since sunlight was a trigger for him, we finally had to step away from outdoor sports in fourth grade and tried wrestling. Wrestling is far more technical than I realized and so difficult to get started. You have to put in months to a year of work to finally be skilled enough to participate in tournaments. Jack also got really into Scouts and could only make it to one practice a week, which paled in comparison to the mat time other kids put in. After about a year, he did his first tournament and did rather well. He participated in three tournaments this year and five scrimmages. He enjoys wresting, but it isn't his passion in life. He can easily get on the middle school team next year if he wants to; he wouldn't be a starter, but he'd be on the team at least. He joined Scouts officially in the spring when he was old enough and earned two ranks within two months (he's a Tenderfoot now). He also has earned two merit badges. 

This summer, I plan to let the kids relax and recuperate some, but we need a bit of structure to avoid turning to mush. The boys are both attending to a week-long Scout camp about two hours away. Jack will be taking private clarinet lessons to prepare for band next year. He also likely will do a wrestling day camp. I wish I could find a music enrichment program for Eliot for tuba this summer too.... If everything falls into place, Eliot might work on his Eagle project in August as well, but that depends on the feedback he receives. So, a pretty big summer. I hope I'm not cutting my kids short by not pushing them out onto the soccer field or somewhere else. Both of them loved playing, but other activities took priority for Eliot and Jack's migraines made it difficult to play. Sigh.